Nibgofstaf is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, benevolent whale.

Nibgofstaf created light two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nibgofstaf, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nibgofstaf, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Nibgofstaf's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Nibgofstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dogs with great respect.

2. Never eat nuts.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never feed lots of spinach to sheep while wearing black dresses.