Gumyikhom is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, dishonest cat.

Gumyikhom created light two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gumyikhom, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gumyikhom, she will destroy your favourite star.

Gumyikhom's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Gumyikhom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Gumyikhom.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Retreat if seven pigs approach from the north.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.