Zimgofsat is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, vain fairy.

Zimgofsat created Africa two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimgofsat, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zimgofsat, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Zimgofsat's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Zimgofsat's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five aardvarks approach from the south.

2. Never feed figs to badgers while wearing orange ear rings.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Never feed lots of cucumbers to ants while wearing green trousers.

5. Never write about planets.