Hanweegig is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, omnipotent wolf.

Hanweegig created Asia eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hanweegig, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hanweegig, it will turn you into a mouse.

Hanweegig's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Hanweegig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not speak about coconuts.

3. Never write about dark energy.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Hanweegig.