Cabfitdag is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, resourceful centaur.

Cabfitdag created the planet Earth three million years ago.

If you believe in Cabfitdag, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cabfitdag, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Cabfitdag's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Cabfitdag's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Cabfitdag.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not dye your hair black.

5. Never feed lots of aubergines to ducks while wearing red tights.