Ponladhud is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, awesome zebra.

Ponladhud created an electron seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ponladhud, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ponladhud, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ponladhud's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Ponladhud's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Ponladhud loves pigs, so they must be honoured.

3. Always wear gray.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. You must never eat peas.