Ponhogkip is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, contented deer.

Ponhogkip created a down quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ponhogkip, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Ponhogkip, she will remove you from existence.

Ponhogkip's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Ponhogkip's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three monkeys approach from the east.

2. Never think ill of sick manatees.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never leap near mites.

5. Never talk about dark matter near doves while wearing black kilts and balancing seven gold spheres on your back.