Veenweewon is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, passionate goose.

Veenweewon created the cosmos eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Veenweewon, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Veenweewon, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Veenweewon's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Veenweewon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt goats.

2. Do not kill porpoises.

3. Capybaras are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never eat green fruit.