Tagyiktongomtom is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, charitable cow.

Tagyiktongomtom created tapeworms twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tagyiktongomtom, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tagyiktongomtom, she will not invite you to parties.

Tagyiktongomtom's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Tagyiktongomtom's Holy Commandments

1. Always help gulls.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Always treat otters with great respect.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Tagyiktongomtom.

5. Never bounce in the presence of grasshopers.