Gofvegdub Loptettiflap is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, cheerful ferret.

Gofvegdub Loptettiflap created the universe two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gofvegdub Loptettiflap, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gofvegdub Loptettiflap, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Gofvegdub Loptettiflap's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Gofvegdub Loptettiflap's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat apples.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gofvegdub Loptettiflap.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never go into black rooms.