Ortganmab is a god.

She takes the form of a small, weak wyrm.

Ortganmab created snails four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ortganmab, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ortganmab, she will turn you into a puffin.

Ortganmab's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Ortganmab's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always look after injured rats.

5. Never bounce in holy places.