Spagappfligjap is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, merciless weasel.

Spagappfligjap created a strange quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagappfligjap, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Spagappfligjap, it will turn you into a duck.

Spagappfligjap's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Spagappfligjap's Holy Commandments

1. Put Spagappfligjap first in all things.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near ducks while wearing red coats and balancing seven silicon spheres on your arms.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never paint your face white.