Bed is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, emotional owl.

Bed created the Tadpole Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bed, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bed, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bed's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Bed's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink scarves.

2. Ducks are not to be trusted.

3. Bed loves voles, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

5. Do not make images of living things.