Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, blissful ant.

Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab created an up quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Vabwitwabgutsafwegdunkab's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from violet badgers, for they are unholy.

2. Feed all hungry mice.

3. Never talk about thermodynamics near whales while wearing gray scarves.

4. Never think about nebulae.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.