Linsidhapyak is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witty unicorn.

Linsidhapyak created an up quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Linsidhapyak, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Linsidhapyak, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Linsidhapyak's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Linsidhapyak's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near birds.

2. Never talk about optics.

3. Never wear gray stockings.

4. Linsidhapyak must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not keep six doves in a large pit.