Cub is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, dishonourable hedgehog.

Cub created the planet Venus seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cub, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cub, it will ignore you.

Cub's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Cub's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Cub's priests.

2. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never sit near great tits.

5. Never jump in the presence of otters.