Faggedfag Yokbitcam is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, strong alligator.

Faggedfag Yokbitcam created the universe three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Faggedfag Yokbitcam, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Faggedfag Yokbitcam, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Faggedfag Yokbitcam's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Faggedfag Yokbitcam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your hands.

2. Do not dye your hair orange.

3. Retreat if five great tits approach from the west.

4. You must pray to Faggedfag Yokbitcam three times a day.

5. Always pray immersed in water.