Badtarphot is a god.

She takes the form of a large, omniscient mouse.

Badtarphot created a top quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Badtarphot, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Badtarphot, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Badtarphot's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Badtarphot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Retreat if seven bats approach from the north.

3. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Badtarphot in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Run away from pink nematodes, for they are unholy.