Barnbadnurlyarp is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, all-powerful wombat.

Barnbadnurlyarp created bats four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Barnbadnurlyarp, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Barnbadnurlyarp, she will destroy your home solar system.

Barnbadnurlyarp's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Barnbadnurlyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Barnbadnurlyarp.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.