Wabafvol is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, clever raccoon.

Wabafvol created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wabafvol, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Wabafvol, she will turn you into a plant.

Wabafvol's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Wabafvol's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed onions to seals while wearing white shoes.

2. Never talk about spacetime near mice while wearing magenta dresses.

3. Wabafvol must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Wabafvol in the centre of the settlement.

5. Erect three platinum sculptures of Wabafvol on top of important buildings.