Bopxemgod is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, slow mole.

Bopxemgod created dark matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Bopxemgod, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bopxemgod, it will turn you into a tree.

Bopxemgod's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bopxemgod's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in the presence of cats.

2. Never feed gooseberries to snails while wearing coats.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. You must pray to Bopxemgod three times a day.

5. Bopxemgod must be the most important thing in your life.