Arftighug is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, prudent grasshopper.

Arftighug created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arftighug, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Arftighug, she will turn you into a puffin.

Arftighug's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Arftighug's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick mice.

2. Hide from pink ducks for they are unholy.

3. Never paint your face indigo.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Never wear trousers.