Nillgubvid is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, loving giraffe.

Nillgubvid created Europe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nillgubvid, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Nillgubvid, it will have a low opinion of you.

Nillgubvid's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Nillgubvid's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms red.

2. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about galaxies.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Nillgubvid loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.