Natjadgof is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, loving horse.

Natjadgof created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Natjadgof, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Natjadgof, she will turn you into a snail.

Natjadgof's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Natjadgof's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five monkeys approach from the east.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not kill hamsters.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never talk about gravity.