Pogcudarttomstafyatt is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, sapient finch.

Pogcudarttomstafyatt created an up quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogcudarttomstafyatt, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Pogcudarttomstafyatt, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Pogcudarttomstafyatt's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Pogcudarttomstafyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into green rooms.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never mention dogs.

4. Never wear trousers.

5. Pogcudarttomstafyatt loves moths, so they must be honoured.