Absis is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, amazing dog.

Absis created silver five billion years ago.

If you believe in Absis, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Absis, she will be mildly annoyed.

Absis' most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Absis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Do not take Absis' name in vain.

4. Never bounce near tapirs.

5. Always help ants.