Arfdodstig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, sapient cow.

Arfdodstig created energy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfdodstig, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Arfdodstig, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Arfdodstig's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Arfdodstig's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never feed pineapples to whales while wearing magenta jumpers.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Arfdodstig loves dogs, so they must be respected.

5. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.