Pitwodfad is a god.

He takes the form of a small, thoughtless mongoose.

Pitwodfad created Asia four years ago.

If you believe in Pitwodfad, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pitwodfad, he will turn you into a tree.

Pitwodfad's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Pitwodfad's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of onions to moths while wearing white skirts.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never eat bark.

4. You must never eat peas.

5. Do not drink alcohol.