Betmonlistbit is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, annoying sheep.

Betmonlistbit created energy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betmonlistbit, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Betmonlistbit, he will laugh at you.

Betmonlistbit's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Betmonlistbit's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Never talk about dark matter near doves while wearing magenta shorts and balancing nine copper spheres on your back.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Hide from mauve nematodes for they are unholy.