Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, sapient squid.

Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt, she will turn you into a worm.

Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six ducks approach from the north.

2. Do not keep three goats in a large pit.

3. Erect a giant red sculpture of Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt in the centre of the settlement.

4. Worship no other gods but Parkgilpakartpoddossgudnutt.

5. Never look in ponds.