Fossgepflam is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, moody chinchilla.

Fossgepflam created an up quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fossgepflam, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fossgepflam, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fossgepflam's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Fossgepflam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Hide from fawn birds for they are unholy.