Gomhunveennulxinhadkem is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, awesome spider.

Gomhunveennulxinhadkem created life five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomhunveennulxinhadkem, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Gomhunveennulxinhadkem, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gomhunveennulxinhadkem's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Gomhunveennulxinhadkem's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured eagles.

2. Always help sick great tits.

3. Erect a large lead sculpture of Gomhunveennulxinhadkem on top of all buildings.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.