Vogjabsan Yartxucksit is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, tranquil elephant.

Vogjabsan Yartxucksit created the Sombrero Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogjabsan Yartxucksit, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vogjabsan Yartxucksit, he will laugh at you.

Vogjabsan Yartxucksit's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Vogjabsan Yartxucksit's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Vogjabsan Yartxucksit in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always help sick bats.

3. Do not dye your hair purple.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not take Vogjabsan Yartxucksit's name in vain.