Fombenbuthadflanfemfod is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, caring goblin.

Fombenbuthadflanfemfod created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fombenbuthadflanfemfod, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fombenbuthadflanfemfod, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Fombenbuthadflanfemfod's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Fombenbuthadflanfemfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics near otters while wearing white tights and balancing seven silicon spheres on your legs.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Fombenbuthadflanfemfod loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

5. Never skip in holy places.