Cepcisshom is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, fast crocodile.

Cepcisshom created viruses eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cepcisshom, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cepcisshom, he will curse you with boils.

Cepcisshom's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Cepcisshom's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven hamsters approach from the west.

2. Cepcisshom must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never feed lots of apples to sheep while wearing blue shoes.

5. Never write about spacetime.