Tencarjan is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, humane weasel.

Tencarjan created the planet Jupiter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tencarjan, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tencarjan, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tencarjan's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Tencarjan's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry seals.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not take Tencarjan's name in vain.