Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, bad-tempered seal.

Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat created a strange quark four years ago.

If you believe in Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Flamlibhin Vadkiknigteenarpflat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never talk about spacetime.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about seals.

5. Never write about dark energy.