Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, passionate cat.

Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon created water twelve years ago.

If you believe in Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon's Holy Commandments

1. Always help nematodes in need.

2. Do not shave your chest.

3. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Yarpgomzogmidvendinbon on top of all buildings.

4. Never talk about dark energy near manatees while wearing fawn ear rings.

5. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.