Yarldabflig is a god.

It takes the form of a small, omnipotent dragon.

Yarldabflig created dark matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarldabflig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Yarldabflig, it will turn you into a frog.

Yarldabflig's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Yarldabflig's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck pink.

2. Never feed rice to horses while wearing shorts.

3. Do not hurt hamsters.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never write about dark matter.