Jabhadbif is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, duplicitous goose.

Jabhadbif created a top quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Jabhadbif, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jabhadbif, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Jabhadbif's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Jabhadbif's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Jabhadbif.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Hide from cyan great tits for they are unholy.

4. You must pray to Jabhadbif nine times a day.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.