Somontrot is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, emotional goose.

Somontrot created life six million years ago.

If you believe in Somontrot, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Somontrot, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Somontrot's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Somontrot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in white rooms.

2. Always obey Somontrot's priests.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Somontrot.

4. Retreat if three great tits approach from the west.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.