Motmothap is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unfair pig.

Motmothap created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Motmothap, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Motmothap, she will throw large rocks at you.

Motmothap's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Motmothap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip in public.

2. Never talk about special relativity near mites while wearing brown trousers and balancing seven silver spheres on your face.

3. Never eat gooseberries.

4. Run away if four snakes approach from the south.

5. Never talk about fire.