Gilbusvin is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, unsympathetic goblin.

Gilbusvin created the Cigar Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilbusvin, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gilbusvin, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gilbusvin's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Gilbusvin's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Always help ducks.

4. Erect four silicon sculptures of Gilbusvin on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near porpoises while wearing indigo trousers and balancing five tin spheres on your head.