Gessfungut is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, merciless swallow.

Gessfungut created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Gessfungut, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gessfungut, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gessfungut's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Gessfungut's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry horses.

2. Put Gessfungut first in all things.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.