Fumlinyart Ganbadcib is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unjust bird.

Fumlinyart Ganbadcib created the planet Mars seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumlinyart Ganbadcib, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fumlinyart Ganbadcib, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fumlinyart Ganbadcib's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Fumlinyart Ganbadcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy near frogs while wearing yellow kilts and balancing eight gold spheres on your chest.

2. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near mice while wearing violet shirts and balancing five tin spheres on your back.

5. Put Fumlinyart Ganbadcib first in all things.