Vonkbambep Bellruttaf is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unjust rat.

Vonkbambep Bellruttaf created the planet Venus seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonkbambep Bellruttaf, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Vonkbambep Bellruttaf, he will turn you into a plant.

Vonkbambep Bellruttaf's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Vonkbambep Bellruttaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near cats while wearing orange scarves.

2. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

3. You must never eat cherries.

4. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not dye your hair purple.