Jamstipbad is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tranquil dove.

Jamstipbad created viruses five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jamstipbad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jamstipbad, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Jamstipbad's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Jamstipbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Do not hurt tapirs.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never talk about fire.