Fempogdot is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, staggering wyrm.

Fempogdot created carbon seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fempogdot, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fempogdot, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Fempogdot's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Fempogdot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about aubergines.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never wear orange tights.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always make sure there are no dogs in a room before entering it.