Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, uncaring wasp.

Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit created carbon nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit, he will refuse to believe in you.

Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Sandcemaf Bengoddavtit's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from pink whales for they are unholy.

2. Never feed turnips to tortoises while wearing blue tights.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.