Bagflisjen is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, contented warg.

Bagflisjen created the world four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bagflisjen, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bagflisjen, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bagflisjen's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Bagflisjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about cherries.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not wear brown clothing.

4. Never think about nucleic acids.

5. Do not hurt grasshopers.